There were those who told her, that only God could save her soul and set it free. Yet on questioning those people she found, that they were not at peace either. They believed that everyone but themselves was wrong and rotten and had to be put on the right track.
But even worse – they hated themselves and foremost their bodies. The flesh, as some called the body, was constantly tempting them to do things, their holy books had made unlawful and even hateful. They were so worried about (not) sinning, that it would sometimes seem, they hated their own sinful nature even more than the atheists.
She met politicians who were unable to make any sense of what she asked. They were so wrapped up in their way of thinking, that they could look neither left nor right nor up or down or around the bend.
Of the few politicians, who actually managed to listen, she learned, that all she had to do, was to be a good citizen and that meant: have a job, get married, have children, never be ill, spend you money, always pay taxes and please die on the day of retirement. And yes – vote for the right party, be content and don’t ask questions.
“And what about my soul? What about my anger?”
“Your soul, my child? That is very romantic. You just be a good worker and everything will be all right.”
For years she journeyed on and talked to anyone she met. Some just laughed at her, some told her she was crazy, others said: “You are thinking too much, that’s your problem. Turn off that head of yours.”
Most said: “Get a job.” or “All you need is a husband and you will stop being silly.”
There were also some spiritual people, who taught her a lot about the union between the body, the mind and the soul. Yet whenever they came to pointing out, that all she needed was to reconnect with the universal power, she failed. She tried to meditate, she tried to grasp a power beyond hers – but she never could. Sometimes she wondered, whether her mind was just too busy to allow for sufficient quiet.